bad day.

2 types of people on trains i dont like.

one - those who read newspaper on the train. especially when the train is already packed like mad, some people still open up their newspapers and read it. ZZZ.

two - those who lean on the poles. come on, if your whole body lean on one pole then how people hold on to the poles. and this is especially irritating when the train is packed and crowded like mad.

i should be doing my accounting work. whatever, bad mood.

我要的不是你的对不起...

i can't.

i can't.
i can't.
i can't.
i can't.
i can't.
i can't.
i can't.
i can't.
i can't.
i can't.
i can't.
i can't.
i can't.
i can't.
i can't.
i can't.
i can't.
i can't.
i can't.
i can't.

tired thursday.

been more than a month since i'm back.
many people have lost interest in blogging.
i'm one of them.
oh well but sometimes it's a good place to write when i'm bored.
haha.

midterms have ended, and projects are due-ing soon.
assignments are due here and there.
final exams is in less than 2 months time.
cant afford to stop studying can i?
after that will be long break and gosh i'm going year 3 soon.
time flies, seriously.
got to find job during the holidays.
yea so anyone who happens to read this and have any job recommendations can just contact me.
money has never been enough.

sometimes, my heart sank for no reason.
sometimes, i just feel sad.
sometimes, i just want to sleep the whole day.
sometimes, i'm tired.
sometimes, i need to talk, but no idea who to talk to.
sometimes, i cant seem to express myself well.
sometimes, the words just doesnt come out.
sometimes, i'm confused.
sometimes, i'm unsure.
sometimes, i feel bad.
sometimes, i'm jealous.
sometimes, i dont care
sometimes, i feel guilty.
sometimes, i'm scared.
and sometimes, i feel so lonely.

i wished i had more courage.

expectations vs reality

Expectations, good or bad?
i know i shouldnt expect alot.
i know i shouldnt.
i know.

yet, i still expect, and getting greedier.

it's rabbit year.

today, technically is forth day of lunar new year.
listening to all the oldies.
and feel like singing out loud.
but it's the middle of the night!
have assignments due not done yet.
have to do it soon.
yes. like probably morning.

havent been writting for a month.
no idea what to write.
no point in writing.
perhaps nobody is reading anyway.
jan passed rather quickly.
sch as usual.
mid terms are coming real soon.
yes i need to study. seriously.

this year went visiting, the usual places.
nothing much.
keep eating, from one place to another.

sometimes, seems to have so much things to do, yet i just cant make myself do something about it.
sometimes, seems like i'm too dependent. Independence is a very important condition. yes in statistics i mean. HAHA.
ok whatever.
sometimes, i dont know what am i thinking too.
sometimes.

well, life's short i know.
shouldnt think too much.
but cannot dont think also.
reality's too cruel.
and seems so hard to be myself sometimes.
gosh why i am emo-ing now.
i should stop before anything else happens.
haha.

that's all for now i guess.
GO STUDY MS KANG.

new year's eve.

it's been long since my last entry.
dec was fun.
was out almost everyday.
didnt work, yet spending so much.
bad me.

2010 coming to an end.
i've probably changed.
no idea what i've become.
i cant believe it too.
bad me.

it's the last day of the year.
so what?
another year will come.
probably with more things coming my way.
i hope i have the strength to face everything.
i feel kind of weak now.
oh well.
bad me.

getting tired.
shall go sleep.
goodnight.
hope i'll have sweet dreams.
sweet dreams for bad me.

useless me.

somehow...
i feel useless.

who am i?
why am i in this world? the earth wont stop rotating without me. i feel so small.
what am i supposed to do?
where should i be?
what should i work as?
why am i studying what i am studying?
why do i feel useless?

just feeling... unsure.

oh wells, sleep time people.
goodnight.