uncertainties.

there are so many uncertainties.
uncertain about what i want.
be it job, study, r/s, anything you can think of.
i know i should be focused.
but it's easier said than done. which things arent?
sometimes i really hate myself
for procrastinating, for being avoidant, for being ignorant, for being indecisive, for being selfish, for being short-sighted(not refering to my eye sight though), for being not so clever.
seems like a lot of minus points about myself huhh.
i dont like uncertainties. but they wont disappear.

for the last lecture of my gem2000 module, the lecturer gave a presentation on 'taking exams'.
he didnt stop encouraging us throughout the lecture and he said he believed we can do it.
sometimes it's because you're doubting your ability too much that makes you fail.
of course i do understand that we should not be over confident of ourselves too.
but what i cant gauge is the bounds.
who determines the bounds?
how do we know?
i admit, i didnt like the lecturer's way of teaching, and i didnt really have a good impression of him
but as a person, he's one nice guy.
instead of pondering here about these questions, i guess it'll be better if i do some constructive work before i sleep.

anyway, seriously my body clock is totally weird.
i sleep late at night, and feels so tired during the day even though i've had enough sleep.
been more efficiently doing things at night.
i wonder why. Hmmmm.

2 more weeks and exams are here.
I cant say I'm prepared, yes because i'm not!!!
how great right.
I knew exactly that I should be studying hard, especially this is probably my last year in uni.
argh.